About the blog:

Well, hello! Thanks for stopping by to read my opinions about movies that I see. Some are older and most are new. Some I go to see in the theaters (both live performances and movies) and some I watch from the comfort of my own couch and even more, I will watch from the amazing Netflix app. Of course, these will be my personal thoughts about the targeted item, however, it will give you an idea of whether it's a colossal waste of time or worth a shot!

Saturday, September 22, 2018

Don't Kill It

GENERAL INFORMATION
Release Info: 3 March 2017 (Netflix)
Genre:Action, Comedy, Fantasy
Director:Mike Mendez
Writer: Dan Berk and Robert Olsen
Running Time: 83 Minutes
Staring: Dolph Lundgren, Kristina Klebe and a cast of people that I've never heard of and I'm sure you haven't either!
Rating? UNRATED (For a reason)
SPOILERS? YES

REVIEWS
IMDB: 5.2 of 10
MY RATING: 4 of 10

STORYLINE
When an ancient demon is accidentally unleashed in the sparsely populated Mississippi town of Chickory Creek.

MY REVIEW
You know, when there is an UNRATED straight to Netflix movie and I tell myself, "Self, go ahead, they can't be all bad!" I should go ahead and kick myself in the face! I gave one point for Dolph Lundgren and his old ass attempting to be a sexy demon hunter and one additional point for it being JUST stupid enough to be amusing enough to watch until the end. To be honest, it wasn't THAT horrible. It was not pretending to be anything that it was not. It was corny and the dialogue was horrible.

SPOILERS BELOW!!

Let's start with the idea that the main character, played with the devotion of an emotionless automaton by Dolph Lundgren was named JEBEDIAH! The premise is pretty simple. Demon is unleash on a small Mississippi town and when it is killed it takes the body of the one who killed it, hence the title "Don't Kill It." Seems like the writer just took some old myths from the 1500's and injected the plot of Fallen and added a sprinkle of Dolph and a few well endowed actresses and voila!

What I DID LIKE about this movie:
  • Bloody violent. Yeah, you heard me. THAT is what I liked about this movie. Mainly because everything else was so mediocre.
What I DID NOT LIKE about this movie:
  • Cheesy one-liners galore and most of them fell flat.
  • What about that ending? Really
  • Hire a technical consultant! I mean seriously, In the first act of the movie, one of the actors is submersed in boiling water and immediately is showing bubbles and boils. Yeah, that's not gonna happen at all!
On a more personal note..... 
Pretty cute pic of Dexter Morgan and Lord Oliver.... AND BRAVES win 2018 NL East!! 

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